Ah all those delightful things people say about our infertility. 😩 I spent years thinking it meant I wasn’t healthy or I was less than. Thank goodness for you Helen and your words xxxx
When trying to conceive our daughter our infertility was technically unexplained although my husband’s sperm analysis when he entered treatment was a bit below average so they suggested that might have been part of the problem (he started taking daily vitamins and his analysis was completely normal a few months later). Looking back, he didn’t seem to feel guilty at all that we hadn’t gotten a sperm analysis earlier so that we wouldn’t have been trying for so long when he was having below average motility. But supposedly nothing was going on that they could tell with me, but I was still so annoyed that my body wasn’t working right, especially since I had had a miscarriage right after we began trying so it made me think we should be able to get pregnant again quickly. Ultimately we did conceive the cycle after the 4th IUI attempt failed, and our daughter is now 4. Ultimately all our pregnancies occurred without treatment (3 miscarriages, 1 living child), but we never could’ve gotten pregnant at all if we hadn’t gone to treatment, so it’s weird how that worked.
I am still trying to conceive again since it has only been about a year since my last miscarriage- we will see how it goes, but I no longer stop myself from sharing my story. I don’t feel like I treat it like a big deal to answer questions about my family plan anymore, I just answer honestly, and that is helping me let go of shame.
“Burn the shame disco down”!- YES- *grabs matches*
Ah all those delightful things people say about our infertility. 😩 I spent years thinking it meant I wasn’t healthy or I was less than. Thank goodness for you Helen and your words xxxx
When trying to conceive our daughter our infertility was technically unexplained although my husband’s sperm analysis when he entered treatment was a bit below average so they suggested that might have been part of the problem (he started taking daily vitamins and his analysis was completely normal a few months later). Looking back, he didn’t seem to feel guilty at all that we hadn’t gotten a sperm analysis earlier so that we wouldn’t have been trying for so long when he was having below average motility. But supposedly nothing was going on that they could tell with me, but I was still so annoyed that my body wasn’t working right, especially since I had had a miscarriage right after we began trying so it made me think we should be able to get pregnant again quickly. Ultimately we did conceive the cycle after the 4th IUI attempt failed, and our daughter is now 4. Ultimately all our pregnancies occurred without treatment (3 miscarriages, 1 living child), but we never could’ve gotten pregnant at all if we hadn’t gone to treatment, so it’s weird how that worked.
I am still trying to conceive again since it has only been about a year since my last miscarriage- we will see how it goes, but I no longer stop myself from sharing my story. I don’t feel like I treat it like a big deal to answer questions about my family plan anymore, I just answer honestly, and that is helping me let go of shame.